A couple grinning widely after a long run.

Days 120-130: Spring Break and Big Decisions


It’s been a crazy mixed up world the last week or so…I went to my training and we endured a very anxious, very whiny six year old the whole time we were in Little Rock. Then we went to Magnolia to visit family for a few days…it was a roller coaster of a time due mostly to heavy decisions that needed to be made. We came back to Fort Smith and little love was off to her dad for a few days. I worked on papers and notes and cleaned her closet…and did other meaningless but entirely necessary tasks (i.e., the laundry). On Sunday, little love re-entered our world.

A run girl sleeping among a mountain of white blankets.

It was a tough day for me.

I had to tell her father that a decision had been made without him regarding his daughter. I have enough empathy in me that my heart is sad about this. Although he and I were not a good match for the long haul, I know he loves his daughter. It’s a terribly rough moment to look someone in the eye and say,”I’m taking the thing you love best…”

And here we stand in mid-step…seasons changing…confused order…beautiful chaos…

I am trying my hardest to flow and not control…I once had a friend describe these types of moments as a snow globe…it’s like being shaken and just watching all your life’s details float down around you…you hope they land well…and honestly, so far, they have…details are coming together…pleasant surprises have popped up…and love has been all around…

Purple pansies and tulips in a barrel with a watering can in the background.

It’s Sunday evening and as I walk into the house to share a meal with some of my most loved people, I notice my winter pansies dancing around my graceful spring tulips and I smile. Seasons are always changing and they are all beautiful…

 

We are moving and it’s all going to be okay.


Published by

Rachel Olienyk

I'm mother, wife, and worker but most important human. I have accepted a challenge to "take a walk" everyday for one year. My goal is in giving space to mindfulness I will create intentional living. I've decided to share my journey through blogging. Be it peace, be it inspiration, be it annoyance, I hope you feel as you read and in feeling may growth transpire. Namaste my gentle readers...